The tradition of Virginity among young Yoruba women before marriage is known as “Asa Ibale” in the Yoruba Kingdom. This tradition is no longer practised today because it has been eroded by colonialisation. A virgin is someone who has never had s*xual intercourse or s*xual activity.
During the traditional era and before the advent of colonialism, virginity was held at high esteem among the Yoruba people. A lady is expected to get married as a virgin as having s*xual intercourse before the wedding ceremony is a taboo. This is the reason why the intending couple are not allowed to have close contact or be in the same room with each other before the D-day: thus, the need for an intermediary (Alarina).
Virginity to them is known as ‘Ibale’ and it is the pride of any Yoruba lady to keep hers till her wedding night. The wedding night is usually seen as a frightening day for the bride and her parents. In those days, mothers were fond of asking their daughters about their virginity so as to prevent the shame and disgrace that come with not been a virgin.
On the wedding night, a piece of white clothing is usually given to the couple (groom in particular) and the cloth will be spread on their bedding, mostly mats. The parents of both families sometimes stay at the entrance of the house waiting for the cloth to be brought out of the house while some parents will be in their homes expecting a result. In this culture, the piece of white cloth is expected to be stained by blood and after the s*xual intercourse, if the cloth is stained, it means that the new bride is a virgin. If it turns out that the white cloth is not stained with blood, it signifies that the new bride had been promiscuous and slept with a man before.
A bride that is met as a virgin by her husband will be celebrated while the one that is not will be disgraced and banished from the village. The white cloth (stained or not) will be sent to the bride’s parents. Other items like rotten yam, half-filled matches or an empty box of matches, a half keg of palm wine will also be sent to them meaning that their daughter was rotten and not complete before she was married. The parents will be publicly blamed for not training their daughter. Grief, sorrow and loud cries will follow suit. Such a bride will sweep the whole village, dance naked in the market place before she’s finally banished from her village. The groom also has the right to divorce such a woman with immediate effect.
On the other hand, if the newly-wed was met as a virgin, the groom’s family will send a full keg of palm wine, full matches box to the bride’s parents indicating that their daughter was complete before the wedding night. She will be praised publicly while her parents will be proud and happy. It is believed that virgins have self-discipline and are well-trained by their parents.
This custom of virginity retainment has many advantages as it prevents the rate of fornication and helps the married women to be faithful with to their husbands. Also, many lives have been lost owing to this tradition as some young ladies have committed suicide because of the shame of not being a virgin before your wedding night.
Highly respected persons or elders can also commit suicide if their daughter was found to have lost her virginity before her marriage. This tradition is longer in existence because of colonization and lack of regards to morality among the females of nowadays.
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